VeeVee Pissed

I'm a Bitch.

This has been stated by me before. But I am an even bigger Bitch when I am pissed off. I become this snarling, hissing, clawing harpy. My voice lowers and "Vic" comes out big time.

"But Vee why are you telling us this?" I'll tell you why. We know that in this world not EVERYONE can be trusted right? If everyone in your world can be trusted I'd like to come and stay with you. So, we know that not everyone can be trusted but do we also know about small matters of disappointment versus full on betrayals? No? Allow me to demonstrate: Back before I met Christopher, when I was still hurting from a failed engagement I signed up for an online dating account (yes I know...shocking). There were a few guys here in Polk County that were interested but mostly because to them I was a novelty. They'd either never been with a black woman (how many of you are surprised that was the reason?), or they were fascinated that I seemed like the perfect blend of man and woman (guess we know why now). I LOVE to cook, clean, shop, cuddle, take care of others, kids, babies, dressing up and I could pull off the submissive, demure housewife wihout a hitch. But I also LOVE sports, playing and watching, going to strip clubs, porn, fucking someone, I hate talking about my feelings (used to anyway) and I am extremely strong and dominant.

So I was going on dates that weren't working out until one day I get this message from a guy named Brian. Brian was great, he sent me photos of him (he was gorgeous), and we talked for months before meeting. He met me at the mall at my job. He called my name: Are you Veronica? And I turned around looking for the man attached to the voice I knew so well and didn't see him. I heard: Vee? And then...I looked down.

Yes, he'd neglected to tell me that while I stand at 5'8" he was only 4'10". I was shocked, disappointed and extremely upset and then I realized that in the grand scheme of things, his height wasn't that BIG of a deal. He was still the guy I had gotten to know over those few months, even thoug he had misled me in one area it didn't mean that the rest of him was rotten. "Don't let one apple ruin the whole bunch." Brian and I are still friends today. He is married, with children and went with me to Christopher's funeral.

I said that because within the last week I have watched certain group members of a book group I am a part of turn something as small as two members whose pictures may or may not really be theirs into a fucking mountain of suspicion and venom. Their very identities have been called into question. I wasn't going to talk about it on my blog because if adults don't know not to keep your guard up sufficiently when dealing with those online until they have proved themselves to be trustworthy then they need to go back and read the WARNING label on every social networking website ever created. BUT I had a friend share a comment some other...well....ass, made, that called into question ANOTHER dear friend of mine. So how did a picture issue become all three of these people are liars, fakes and phonies? People can be supremely venomous when they feel foolish or betrayed. But why should a few pictures lead them to feel this way? The people in question are too popular to have their ACTUAL pictures online, so they confess to it and move on, but now this whole thing has caused, for me, a whole new view of a lot of other people as their vicious, hateful, idiotic comments poured forth.

Vic started snapping at the bit.

I'm a Scorpio and we're known not just for being amazing, nymphomaniac lovers, but also for our razor-sharp tongues. I wanted to rip every person on that thread a new hole, because now they were taking it too far and now they were accusing someone that saved my fucking life! I wanted to rip this broad's throat! With my words...but still.

It just made me realize yet again how much of a protective Bitch I am and how truly ridiculous some people can be. The way the suspicions and speculations are jumping around it's like a fucking witch hunt: Oh! She wore all black so she must be a witch and she must have killed that man using witchcraft. BURN HER AT THE STAKE!

Overly dramatic? Maybe. True? Yes.

I don’t really have any deep thought to end this with. Just...remember that NO ONE is perfect. Not you, not me, not anyone. So unless someone online maliciously and intentionally deceives you, remember no one shares everything, we all save a piece of ourselves to retain a part of our privacy. You may see photos of me but you will never see photos of my real life friends or my family or loved ones and if I ever meet any of you I won't be posting our pictures online either.

Because I have developed some of the strongest relationships with people I met online and I take precautions, but I always remember that what I know from online is probably not what I will see in real life. How do I know that? I'm an adult, I don’t live in a fantasy world and, oh yeah......

I'm a Bitch.

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